Testing

•November 17, 2009 • 1 Comment

I got a Droid this weekend, courtesy of my generous employer. In conservative terms it’s probably the coolest Christmas present I’ve received since I was young enough that every Christmas present was the coolest Christmas present ever. That’s more a testament to the boyish wonder this thing evokes than to the quality of the presents I’ve received as an adult.

This here is a test of the system, to see if indeed I can post to my blog from my telephone. Which is an odd notion, that the handful of ultraconcentrated technology I’m holding is also a telephone. I owned it about 24 hours before I took a call on it, there’s so much other internettiness and such to be had here. And it’s even more odd to be posting something longer than 160 characters from a phone.

Get Mad

•November 6, 2009 • Leave a Comment

Advice to myself for the day, from Alec Baldwin’s speech in Glengarry Glen Ross, his only lines in what is arguably his best performance:

“Get mad, you sons of bitches, get mad.”

Don’t fold, don’t complain, don’t get all sorry for yourself. Get pissed off and get something done.

 

Love It or Leave It

•November 3, 2009 • Leave a Comment

I’m reexamining my life recently. Something I have had a lot of practice in over the years. I can diagnose and prescribe appropriate plans of actions like it’s nobody’s business, hyper self-aware and ubercritical as I am. What I am less good at is doing the things I determine I should do to improve my life, at least in a long-term, life-improving fashion. I mentioned Francis Chan’s book Crazy Love recently; I think it would have been more appropriately titled something like Love that Kicks You in the Rich White American Ass and Scatters Your Uselessly Hoarded Stuff to People Who Maybe Really Need It. Or else perhaps One of Those Books You’ll Love and Recommend to All Your Christian Friends and then Try to Forget About as Quickly as You Can. Not the sort of titles that sell books though, which would undercut the purpose of writing it I guess.

I am hesitant to pronounce anything I have gleaned or “figured out” from reflecting on this book, even in such a quasi-anonymous forum like this blog. Perhaps this one thing is pertinent though: “trying harder” to love God and live toward others in that light is preposterous. Renewed effort only covers up my own drastic shortcomings in the faith and spirituality department; it doesn’t fill the hole.

I opened the Bible this morning, the first time in months (years?) I haven’t done so just to follow along with something someone else was saying or writing. I didn’t get through much, maybe a chapter, but it’s a very different world in there when I read it as best I can as written, trying to leave aside all the things I have been spoon-fed about it, whether those things were genuinely helpful and offered as such or not. It was a simple experiment and hardly worth mentioning if I didn’t intend to continue it.

It’s Not About Me

•September 28, 2009 • Leave a Comment

I read Francis Chan’s book Crazy Love the better part of a year ago, and I’m going back through it now with our small group. It’s a short book and a quick read, but I think I’ll always be measuring my life by some of the standards it touches on. Reading it alone the first time, I felt overwhelmed. This time through, as I begin to talk it out (I’m such an external processor), I’m seeing some things I hadn’t before.

There’s not time now to explore what I’ve come across, but here’s what I’ve been chewing on recently:

It’s not about me.

Such a simple and self-evident statement pertaining to the sort of impassioned and self-sacrificial life I believe a faith in a good God requires. But I really don’t get it.

It’s not about me.

The roadblocks to the life I really want are all about me. What I have or don’t have, what I can or can’t do, what I will or won’t do. These things keep me in my current day to day life. Which is a fine life. But perhaps its defining characteristic is that it’s about me. This other life, or way of life actually, is not.

Signing off, mid-ponder.

NakedPastor

•September 1, 2009 • 1 Comment

I’ve enjoyed this guy’s cartoons before, but I just found his T-shirt design gallery. Some pretty comical stuff in there for the casual Christian, like these gems.

Fishionary Position

Fishionary Position

WANTED: New Black Bag

•August 28, 2009 • Leave a Comment

Complaining has been a problem for me recently. Or rather I’ve had no problem complaining, it’s the toxic fallout of stewing, criticizing, looking for worst-case scenarios and playing out arguments in my head that has plagued me. I discovered this quote from Richard Rohr today that resonates with me:

“I will offer you a simple litmus test to determine whether a person has healthy or unhealthy religion. What do they do with their pain—even their daily little disappointments? Do they transform their pain or do they transmit it?

We all have pain—it’s the human situation, we all carry it in a big black bag behind us and it gets heavier as we get older: by betrayals, rejections, disappointments, and wounds that are inflicted along the way. If we do not find some way to transform our pain, I can tell you with 100% certitude we will transmit it to those around us.

At the end of life, and probably early in life, too, the question is, “What do I do with this disappointment, with this absurdity, with this sadness?”

Pain_Logo_messenger_bagI have known people who carry their big black bag on their chest and open it up for you as often as speak to you. And I’ve known other folks whose bag somehow seems to have a perpetual hole in the bottom.

I was talking with a friend the other day about responding to pain. And to another friend about adjusting our attitude. And with both the consensus was this is no small matter. It is one thing to practice the habits that essentially amount to squeezing my eyes tight and whistling along with Monty Python (come on, you know it),

Always look on the bright side of life…

It’s quite another thing to make a fundamental worldview shift and learn to deal with the vast quantities of pain and disappointment I encounter in a transformative way rather than deny it and/or transmit it. On the other hand, as I admitted in yet another recent conversation (interesting how most of my processing these days is through conversation), I used to be the sort of person who who contributed more positively and constructively to my world; lately I seem to be trending toward the negative. So on these terms at least my worldview has already shifted at least once.

In an article on suffering, a Harvard Law Professor writes about his own suffering ,

“Cancer and chronic pain remain ugly things, but the enterprise of living with them is not an ugly thing.”

This strikes me as close to reality. The “enterprise of living” with pain, disappointment and tragedy is not by definition a bad thing, though the pain itself is notably convincing to the contrary. Is misery as much a self-chosen mantle as joy and hopefulness then? Is a profound worldview change as simple as a deliberate series of choices? I figure if I got myself here somehow, then somehow there is a way out.

The Song That’s Stuck in My Head #4

•August 21, 2009 • 1 Comment

david-crowder-church-music
“How He Loves”
David Crowder* Band

David Crowder and his pals dare you not to smile when you see the cover of their forthcoming album, Church Music, a jab at the glitzy charm of religious television. “How He Loves”, the first single off the record is at once utterly top-of-your-lungs singable and awkwardly clunky. The verses are poetic in a high church hymn sort of way, with more creative rhyming and unexpected meters, and when I first heard them in a congregational singalong setting I found them darn well inaccessible. But it’s the singable chorus that gets lodged in my brain, another THTSIMH example of passionate melody carrying my day. And with that said, here’s a verse:

We are his portion and he is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If his grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.
So heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way…

Things You Can Only Get Away With When You’re Four

•August 5, 2009 • 1 Comment

So I’m at the Reds game Sunday with my family and telling my four year old we’re rooting for the guys in the red shirts. So the guy in the black shirt steps up to bat and Zeke yells at the top of his lungs, “Hey blacks, get out!” I resist the urge to remind him we’re a block from the National Underground Railroad Freedom Center and he really shouldn’t say things like that, and tell him instead, no, call them the Rockies please.

“I Don’t Buy It”

•August 4, 2009 • Leave a Comment

coupleindispute

A New York Times article by a woman married 20 years to hear her husband say one day, “I don’t love you anymore.” Her completely unexpected response here. Worth the full read.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/02/fashion/02love.html?_r=3&pagewanted=all

If This Was Jesus

•July 23, 2009 • 3 Comments

There are many folks out there who are dropping associations with Christianity as much as possible and using other labels or identifiers, like “follower of Jesus”. Lately I’ve been one of them. It’s a simple and surface-level way to dissociate myself from the evils and cultural crap associated with Christianity as a religion. Certain people and groups have made themselves de facto authorities and spokesmen in our culture for Christianity, the voice of the religion to the country. I can’t say I identify with many of them. Rush Limbaugh, the late Jerry Falwell, George W., Fred Phelps, and all those people who bomb clinics and pray at the gas pump. These are the more extreme, perhaps; these are also the most visible. Or Joel Osteen, The Pope, or any other national Christian figurehead for that matter. Also not folks whose faith I particularly identify with. Anyone heard of John Eldredge? Michael Spencer? Dave Schmelzer? These are people in the public sphere whom I would perhaps trust more to speak for my faith.political-pictures-pope-benedict-xvi-jesus-poor

And yet as I was recently reminded, dissociation isn’t quite enough. Changing my language in order to say I am not like them is on the one hand only changing language, and on the other hand only an implied disapproval of them. It doesn’t do much beyond perhaps prompting someone to ask why. The Christian faith, as has been true in one form or another throughout its history, has been co-opted for other means by those who presume to represent it to the world while those who perhaps better represent the life of Jesus are silenced, or maybe just silent, and protest mostly by example if at all.

I had an exchange a while ago with a friend of mine who is an atheist, who himself was frustrated with this dynamic in modern American Christianity. “It is sad to me,” he said, “that people, who outnumber the enemy I think, give in rather than stand up for what is right. What I seldom see is public outcry by Christians against this co-opting. It is my hope that rather than run/hide/rename that more Christians would protest, fight, take back what they see as the tenets of the religion.”

He understands the personal and social values of Christianity, and agrees with many of them in principle, if not with the spiritual claims of the Bible. He might even agree with me when I say there is a need in the world for the sort of love and sacrificial lifestyle Jesus demonstrated. Not that the world needs conversion to Christendom – we’ve seen how that went over. But that there is something powerful and necessary in the life and teachings of Jesus that satisfies a need in humans at large.

It’s probably worth saying at this point that most churches and ministries and Christian communities would say this is what they are about – in one form or another demonstrating to the world the life of Jesus and teaching others to do the same. But is this what the church in general is known for, at least in Western culture? Are churches the places that people go looking for help and support in their deeper needs, and growth and empowerment in their lives? Perhaps those who grew up in the church. And many of them are looking elsewhere lately.

What message then are churches sending? What do people – again, people in Western culture on these terms – think of when they think of Christianity? Or Christians? Rush Limbaugh & co.? At the very least the general hypocrisy of Christianity is glaring. Those who get the most press seem typically to be the ones resisting, categorizing and generalizing, or worse, condemning, attacking, or murdering. “Are people fighting back against them?” My friend asked me. ” Is this a concern in the modern movements?” Actually, no. Not with any visibility at least. And of course there can be a fine line between genuinely protesting the hypocritical co-opting of the faith and becoming another internet watchdog calling foul at every latest outrage from someone who is clearly less Christian than them. That of course is not what I’m thinking of here. I’m thinking of the gap between what the church is and what it could be, to put it broadly.

Culturally modern churches have taken the cool and laid back approach. Come, have coffee, let’s hang out. Which I think is pretty helpful. People need Christians to put down their guns, so to speak. My friend had a different take on it though, which frankly floored me.

“The people at your church are marketers – they want to sell me, don’t just send me a postcard about music and a good time, send me one that says I am a Christian and I don’t kill doctors. Make it very pointed. I am a Christian and I am not so stupid I think Obama is an Islamic terrorist. I am a Christian and my Christ preached love, not shooting at holocaust museums. I am tired of getting happy feel good letters and postcards – Come visit us. I want to see where they stand. I want to see them take a stand.”

The church that would send his sort of postcard probably is not the church for everyone. Then again, who would that church attract? What kind of people would walk through the doors of a church that marketed themselves like that? Troublemakers, boat rockers, idealists, activists, and thinkers. Better still, what kind of Christians would speak of themselves that way? Or live like that?

Here’s one, for starters. A Georgia pastor who has offered to take in any and all unwanted infants. Are there others?